When We Obey, We're Happy All Day

We have always been very fortunate to have faithful hometeachers visit our family. When our boys were little we had a particular companionship of hometeachers that the boys loved. They came diligently each month and were prepared with lessons that were specifically catered to our sons.

One month our hometeachers shared a lesson on obedience. They began the lesson with this little motto: "When we obey, we're happy all day". It left an impression on our family because not only did we add to it... "when we did not, we were sad we forgot"; but this motto has been repeated many times in our home through the years.

Whenever I hear a lesson or a talk on obedience, I can't help but remember a time that I wasn't obedient and was very sad that "I forgot".

As mentioned in a previous post, I had the opportunity to spend a great deal of my summer vacation between my junior and senior years in Great Britain. My trip was divided between my mother's sister in Northern Ireland, my dad's two brothers and my Grandma in England. My mother's uncle and aunt lived in London. Because I was flying in and out of London she arranged for me to stay with them for a few days upon my arrival and the last few days before I returned home.

Of course we didn't have "on-line" anything back then, so I had to make all of my travel arrangements from England to Ireland and then back to England, after I arrived in Britain. My mom took great care in "tutoring" me to ensure that I reached each destination safely and without incident. She provided me with a notebook where she had written all of my relatives names, addresses and phone numbers. I had been given instructions as to when I should arrive at each relatives house and how long I should stay there.

I was booked on a chartered flight which meant that all of the same people were on the flight to and from Britain. Consequently, I knew some of those people. My mom had arranged for me to sit with the George Allan family from Bountiful on the flight over. Upon our arrival in London, the Allan's would be traveling to Scotland, so my mom had asked Maureen Scott, an Irish friend, to accompany me from Gatwick Airport to Victoria Station in London where my mom's Uncle Harry would pick me up. Because I did not know Uncle Harry, nor he me, my mom had told him that I would be wearing a green ribbon pinned to my clothes so that he could identify who I was. With all of those plans and instructions given; off I went.

Now, my mom had given me a shiny piece of green ribbon attached to a safety pin and rehearsed to me that I must wear it. I nodded my head, signifying to my mom, that of course I would wear it... I had not the slightest intention of pinning that green ribbon to my shirt. What teenager would do anything so humiliating?  No, I had a better plan... I would wear a green shirt.

I traveled with the Allan's to England as planned, I then traveled to Victoria Station in London with Maureen Scott, we then parted and I stood against a wall and waited... and waited, for Uncle Harry. I was sixteen years old, and alone in LONDON!!!

I had departed from SLC at 10 pm the night before, and it was now quite late in London. I don't remember how long I waited, but I know it was a long time as I stood against the wall with a suitcase on either side of me. I was SCARED.TO.DEATH; so what do you think I did? I started to cry. I had never heard the term "the ugly cry" until recent years, but I am sure it originated from someone walking through Victoria Station on the night of June 4, 1975 who happened to see a young girl (in a lovely green shirt) sobbing uncontrollably.

Eventually, an older gentleman who appeared to be very concerned, approached me, and in a frustrated voice said, "Lesley????" I could only nod through my sobs. Although I heard several references to the green ribbon, it was happy ending, or... beginning to my trip.

I have never forgotten that experience. How much better things would have been for me had I just obeyed.

I have been to England twice since, and am now embarking on that journey again. For almost a year I have been planning and scheduling; and in recent months, arranging and reserving. A few days ago I was having some difficulty with making on-line reservations for my hotel in London and in purchasing some theatre tickets, so I went to my parents house to arrange for those details over the phone (they have a good phone plan for Britain calls).

I know that this is a wonderful opportunity for me and my daughter to go on this trip; but for me it hasn't been without some stress, anxiety, and yes I will admit... some fear. As I sat at my parents kitchen table and finished these final details over the phone (and I was writing down every detail), I felt such a relief that it was all taken care of, but then the anxieties overcame me and I got emotional. As my tears flowed my parents both assured me that everything would be fine. As I looked at all of the details that I had just written, I couldn't help but laugh through my tears as I said pointing to my notes, "I'm wearing my 'green ribbon' this time." And I am.

Creating A Memory

During the summer of my seventeenth birthday my parents sent me on a 5-week trip to Great Britain to visit my relatives. Before I left my Mom gave me a bar of Yardley English Lavender soap. I was thrilled to have the beautiful lavender bar of smelly soap, up until that day all I had ever used was Dial soap. My Mom explained that by using this special soap on my trip, that forevermore whenever I smelled it, it would bring back memories of my trip. At our Favorites Party last October someone brought Yardley English Lavender soap as their favorite. Immediately remembering my Mother's theory, I hoped that my name would be picked out of the bowl. It wasn't, but I did get a chance to smell the box and immediately the memories flooded my mind, suddenly I was back in England in 1975 at my Uncle Derek's house. My Mom was right!!! So, today I bought a bar of Yardley English Lavender soap for my daughter... 'cause guess where she's going in a few weeks; AND guess who is going with her!!!

Day 22: Happy Happy Birthday Mother Dear

When I started my 31 day challenge I created a list of things that I could blog about. I didn't have ideas for more than half of the days, but today is one that I did have... because it's my Mother's birthday.

When I was a little girl, each year when my Mother's birthday came around we would ask her how old she was, the answer was always the same "twenty-one." It was several years before I actually found out my Mother's real age. I remember learning from her that you don't ask adults... especially women; how old they are.

My Mother is one of my greatest examples. She loves and cares about me, as she does all of her family. She does not complain or murmer about anything. In the last couple of years she has experienced some serious health issues. She faces her trials head on and with faith in the Lord. Even through these experiences she keeps her sense of humor and can make jokes. She is a rock; a pillar of strength and an example to all who know her.

My Mother is still a "Mom" to me. Even though I am a Mom and a Grandma, I am still her baby girl. She encourages me, and praises me, and she always listens to me (I'm sure that is hard sometimes). She never reprimands me or lectures me... she always makes me feel as though my opinions are valid.

My parents are still very self-sufficient and take good care of each other, and they are still capable of taking care of us. They support pretty much everything family members invite them to. They are there cheering for us whatever it is we may be doing. They were at family night at Cherry Hill this week just to be with us, even though neither one of them went down cardiac canyon *smiley face*.

I sat down at my computer recently with my (just turned) two-year-old granddaughter sitting on my lap. We were watching a slide show of pictures and she was enjoying pointing at "mommy" and "daddy"... when a picture of my Mother came across the screen Jane pointed and said, "G'ma Marden". I was so surprised, and also impressed, that a little two-year-old knew and recognized by name her Great-Grandma. I was excited to tell Mother about it and she was so pleased.

I love my Mother. She is the best. I'm grateful that I was sent to her. Happy, happy birthday Mother!!!!

BYU Women's Conference 2011

I just returned from two wonderful days at BYU Women's Conference. The theme this year came from Alma 37:6-7, "By small and simple things are great things brought to pass". I attended opening and closing sessions on both days, and several concurrent sessions each day. Here are some of my favorite quotes from the presenters I listened too:

"The only person I need to be better than... is the person I was yesterday."

"A virtual (too much technology) woman, or a virtuous woman?"

"What comes next for willing hands to do?"

"No one owes me anything, I owe everything to the Lord."

"Charity is living as Christ lived."

"Our families need to feel the spirit when they enter our homes."

"A soft answer turneth away wrath."

"Let us seek the guidance of Heavenly Father, in how we can accomplish His work, in His way."

"Appropriate self love equips us to love others."

"Lifting others, lifts us."

This year several of us attended Women's Conference together. My sister Lilian and sister-in-law Marivic attended for their first time. I was also excited to meet Marivic's sisters Marle and Maries for the very first time, and Marivic's mama (I met 18 years ago) also came. Of course my Mother and Margie (BYUWC veterans) were there as well, but I was most excited that my daughter Caitlin came to Women's Conference with me, it was so wonderful for both of us to share that experience together... we're planning on it being a new tradition.



FYI: starting tomorrow I'm doing a 30 day blog challenge... I know, crazy huh!?!

Family Friday: Featuring My Mother Bea

All that I am or hope to be I owe to my angel mother.
Abraham Lincoln

You might want to grab some popcorn and a drink before embarking on reading this weeks Family Friday, this is probably the longest post so far but this week I'm featuring the Matriarch of our family; my Mother. I mentioned "longevity" in a previous post, well Mother certainly qualifies in the longevity department, she is one of the two original members of our family. First of all let me explain that I do call my Mom, Mother. I've done it for many years and I'm not sure why, but it might have something to do with the fact that every time Mother called me on the phone she would say, "this is your Mother." So I call her Mother, and I'm the only one in the family that does.

Mother was born in Belfast, Northern Ireland. She was the fifth of seven children born to her parents. There was a girl and then three boys before my Mother, when she was born my Grandmother told my Grandfather that they had a "beautiful baby girl". She was named Lilian after her Mother, but goes by her middle name which is Beatrice.

Grandpa, Joe, Bea, Roy, John, Jean, Grandma and Bryan in the front

My Uncle John (Mother's brother) was married to my Dad's sister, he introduced my parents, and it was love at first sight. After a long distance courtship (Dad lived in England) they wanted to get married. My Grandpa wanted them to wait because there wasn't a temple in the British Isles, but a wise Mission President said, "let them get married." And so they were married on July 9, 1956. Two years later on July 10, 1958 they had a beautiful baby girl (me). When I was two months old my parents traveled to England for the dedication of the London Temple. On September 10, 1958, the day after the dedication, we were one of the first families sealed in that temple.

My Mother is a very faithful and courageous woman. In 1962 my parents came to live in America. Dad came in June to find employment so that he could earn the money to bring Mother and their three children. Mother didn't come until October. She traveled to New York by plane with three small children by herself (we were 4, 3, and 1), and then the four of us traveled across the country by train. Can you imagine their young family being an ocean apart for four months!?! Honestly, when I hear the stories of the day that Dad left Ireland and then of the night that we arrived in Salt Lake City four months later, I can't help but cry. They did all of this so that me and my siblings could have a better life.

This picture was taken just before Dad left for America; Mother holding Timothy, Lesley, Dad holding Archie

Mother is my greatest example of what a wife, mother, and grandmother should be. She serves us all unselfishly. She prays for all of us, and on our birthdays we get a special prayer on our behalf. I know that my Mother is there for me; no matter what.

Mother is a wonderful Granma (yes, that is how we spell it when referring to her). A few years ago I sat back and observed Granma enter the room at a family bridal shower. All the teenage granddaughters quickly surrounded her and were all talking to her at the same time, Granma was just like one of the girls. They love her.

Some of the girls at the beach this summer; Megan, Chelsea, Melissa, Granma, Caitlin, and Tara

One of my favorite stories about Mother is when the Princess Beatrice was born in 1988. A few days following the Princesses birth I was listening to the news when it was announced that the newborn Princess would be named Beatrice. I immediately called Mother at her office to tell her the news, she was very excited and I listened as she exclaimed to all of her friends in the office, "they've named the Princess Beatrice!! They've named the Princess Beatrice!!" She turned her attention back to me, who was still on the other end of the phone and said as she lowered her voice and with just a tinge of disgust, "why did they name her Beatrice?" As if it were the most horrible name in the world.

Mother and Dad with their six children; Lesley, Archie, Timothy, Alan, Lilian, and David in 2008

This year Mother was chosen as West Bountiful's Mother of the Year, sponsored by The Davis County Clipper. You may nominate a deserving Mother by sending a letter of 100 words or less explaining why you think she should be Mother of the Year for her community. I decided that my Mother deserved to be West Bountiful's Mother of the year and so I sent in the following letter (which is exactly 100 words):

In 1962 Mother left her homeland; Ireland, to come to America. She had three young children and two suitcases. Dad came four months previously to work and find a home in preparation for us coming. They have lived in West Bountiful since 1962. All of my Mother's posterity, forty-five of us have been blessed because of her sacrifice to leave her home and start anew. Mother loves each member of her family unconditionally and constantly serves us. She has made quilts for more than seventy friends and family. She's fun, loyal, trustworthy, a woman of faith, and she blogs!

West Bountiful's Mother of the Year surrounded by members of her family during the 4th of July parade

A few things to know about Mother: She is a gospel scholar. She is a great teacher. She is the best cook; and she bakes good things too. She served a mission to England with Dad from October 1996 to April 1998. She sews. She makes quilts. She knits. She sings with all her heart (and in Spanish). She serves in the Bountiful Temple. She can pack a suitcase better than anyone I know. If you're going on a trip to Britain, you will want her to plan your agenda. She loves to do jigsaw puzzles. She is an excellent visiting teacher. She loves to go on road trips with Dad. She thinks about others. She likes to buy duplicate pairs of shoes in different colors. She is always optimistic. She's happy and it shows. She was employed by the Church for many years. She has many friends who love her. She is understanding. She's compassionate. She is a wonderful Mother and Grandmother and Great Grandmother, and a blessing to all of her posterity, and we all love her.

My parents 50th wedding anniversary in July 2006

Mother and Dad enjoying some of their posterity at the beach this summer

BYU Women's Conference 2009

I just returned from a wonderful two days at BYU Women's Conference. I had the opportunity to attend several uplifting and motivating classes as well as opening and closing sessions each day. I attended classes about finances, going back to college, self worth, fearing God and not man, faith and sacrifice...

A big highlight for me was attending a class presented by Lynne Sybrowsky who is the wife of Jeremy's mission president. I made sure that I got there early so that I could speak to her before the class started. It was a double bonus when I saw that Elder Sybrowsky (of the seventy) was there as well. We had the opportunity to visit before the class began. There was a mother of another missionary there as well as a sister missionary from Jeremy's mission (she told me that Jeremy had been her Zone Leader). The other mother invited me to sit with her group and we quickly became acquainted. Sister Sybrowsky was an amazing teacher. After the class we visited some more and took some pictures with the Sybrowky's. This was the final class before the closing session on Friday. As I walked alone to the Marriott Center I was overcome with emotion as I felt the spirit of all that had occurred during the two days that I was there. The opportunity to spend those moments with the Sybrowsky's were the icing on the cake, and as I called Jeremy to report I again was overcome with emotion wishing that he had had that experience instead of me.

It is an amazing experience to spend two days at a conference such as this and to feel the spirit which is there constantly. Here are just a few of my favorite quotes throughout the conference:

From my class titled: Man Looketh On the Outward Appearance, but the Lord Looketh On the Heart

"We're all perfectly imperfect human beings"

"Only speak well of yourself"

From Sister Dibb's class: You've Seen Our Sacrifice; Come After Us

"A pioneer is one who goes before, showing others the way to follow." President Monson

From the Friday morning general session where Sister Beck spoke:

In reference to those who say that they have family night on Sunday, Sister Beck said this..."why wouldn't we want Monday in addition to Sunday for family night."

A mother said to her daughter before her wedding day..."it's okay to cook for your husband."

From my class titled: "Fret Not Thyself Because of Evildoers": Fearing God, Not Man

When in conversation with someone who is criticizing or doesn't understand our beliefs..."address the 'light of Christ' in another person."

"We are given the gift of the Holy Ghost to travel 1st class everyday"

"It is a 'joyful burden' to stand as witnesses"

It truly was an incredible two days. I'm grateful to Mike and Caitlin for taking care of things on the homefront so that I could attend, to my Mother for going with me, being able to spend time with Margie and Melissa and some of Margie's family, for wonderful classes, beautiful music, smiling faces, and so much more....

Starting at the right; Phyllis, Suzie, Margie, Melissa, Bea (my mom), Me, and Karen

BYU Women's Conference

Last week my Mother and I spent a wonderful two days at BYU Women's Conference. Some of the highlights of my two days were daily opening and closing sessions where we heard speakers such as Sheri Dew, Julie B. Beck and President Thomas S. Monson (closing session of the conference). I was also able to attend several classes that uplifted, motivated and encouraged me. I was able to give service and enjoyed entertainment by popular LDS performers including Michael McClean who's music brought me peace and comfort years ago during a difficult time in my life. Walking across campus and hearing the bell tower chime the tunes of "Come, Come Ye Saints" and "We Thank Thee O God For A Prophet" brought joy to my heart and tears to my eyes. A sister who came to my aid with a tide stick (she just gave it to me) when I slipped on the wet grass and stained my pant knees, inspired me to be prepared next year with something "extra" to share with someone in need. And being in the presence of a Prophet of God and then singing my favorite hymn "Redeemer Of Israel" with thousands of women (and a few men) at the close of his remarks was a spiritual highlight. I'm looking forward to continuing the tradtion (this was my second year so I think it now qualifies as tradtion) by attending next years conference on April 30 and May 1, 2009.